One of my favorite parts of the movie “Runaway Bride” is when Bob, the football coach fiancé of Maggie (Julia Roberts’ character), uses sports psychology techniques in a vain attempt to train his bride-to-be to overcome her immense fear and to actually walk down the wedding aisle and into holy matrimony.
“Focus on Bob … focus on Bob,” he tells her, pointing to his eyes and instructing her to concentrate completely on his face and eliminate any distractions that could trigger her fears and cause her to bolt.
Maybe I think that part of the movie is so funny because I can relate to it so well.
“Focus on Mary Ann … focus on Mary Ann,” I urge my husband, as I share information of great import that I don’t want him to miss.
“Focus on Mom … focus on Mom,” I tell my sons, as I convey vital pearls of knowledge and wisdom.
Sometimes they focus, sometimes they don’t. The problem is, I usually don’t know that the communication train has derailed until later when they say, “I don’t remember hearing you say that.”
“But I DID say it!” I reply … sometimes loudly. “I even made you look me in the eyes and focus, focus, focus – and you said you were listening. Remember?”
They don’t. I sometimes wonder what on earth they were focusing on while they were obviously not focusing on me, but to figure that out would require venturing into the hinterlands of the male psyche and that’s way too scary for me. All I know is that it’s quite exasperating to realize you have not been listened to.
I get that same feeling when I’m talking to someone at a social gathering and I notice that they are looking around me or over me or through me to someone else they would rather be talking to. At those times, it’s very tempting to sport out with something outrageous just to confirm my strong suspicion that they aren’t hearing a word I am saying.
“Did I tell you that my niece just gave birth to a camel?”
“Uh huh, that’s nice,” they mumble, craning their necks to see who’s who across the room. Tacky, tacky.
There’s nothing like dealing with people to make me appreciate how God deals with us. I never have to wonder if He is distracted. He’s not. I never have to wonder if He’s perhaps hearing my words but missing my heart. He isn’t. He’s completely focused, all the time.
In fact, the Bible says His thoughts toward me are “like the sands of the sea” (Psalm 139). Ever tried to count the grains in a handful of sand? How about just a teaspoonful? I didn’t think so – there are just too many. Now think about the sand on all the beaches in the world. Do you get the feeling that we’re always on God’s mind? It’s true.
No matter what time of day or night I go to God, He can honestly say to me, “Hey – I was just thinking about you.”
I don’t know about you, but I find great comfort in that. I don’t have to corral God’s attention, look Him square in the eye and beg, “Focus on Mary Ann … focus on Mary Ann.” He hears every word I say, and all the words I can’t.
If I ever feel like the communication train with God has derailed, one thing is for sure: I’m the one who jumped the track.