If you’ve ever prayed to have more patience – and who does that?–may I suggest you try to get a donkey into a horse trailer. Especially a donkey who’s been doing only and exactly what he wants to nearly all his life.
One time we needed to take Boo, our donkey, to the vet, so we borrowed a horse trailer and unsuccessfully tried to push and pull that stubborn beast into it for nearly an hour. We were feeling quite desperate when two blessed words popped into my head: sweet feed. We put a bucket of that grain concoction in the trailer and Boo walked right in.
Boo is exactly what I don’t want to be like. Chiefly, I don’t want to call myself a follower of Jesus and then refuse to go where He’s leading. I don’t want to get so comfy where I am that I’m unwilling to move on when I sense Him saying it’s time. When He says, “Let’s get on the trailer now,” I want to hop right in, sweet feed or no sweet feed.
After sharing pieces of my life and my journey with Jesus in this newspaper for more than two decades, I believe it’s time to stop. I’m incredibly thankful to the folks at the Index-Journal for giving me this opportunity. They’re not asking me to stop now, but I believe God is.
Why? That’s the question I’ve been wrestling with since I began to sense Him whispering, “It’s time to let go of this.”
It’s true that at age 65, I want to stop spinning quite so many plates. Some health issues (temporary, I pray) are currently making things a bit challenging. But alas, I’m a born plate-spinner and I hope I can always keep enough of them going to chuckle when someone asks me if I’m retired.
A few years ago, I cleared a few cerebral cobwebs and got certified as a Biblical counselor to serve in what my church calls its “Care Ministry.” It’s a ministry that isn’t as broad as this column has perhaps been, but it’s deep, needed and growing. So many people are struggling and hurting.
In addition to that, last year a friend and I began doing a weekly podcast called “Unquenchable Hope.” I doubt we’ll ever set cyberspace on fire, but we’ve gotten some good feedback from listeners, many of whom are considerably younger than we are. Sharing Biblical truth with the next generations is one of my greatest passions.
Those ministries and some relationships I’ve neglected for too long are the “sweet feed” God is using to move me forward.
Jesus said His sheep know His voice, and although we sheep get it wrong sometimes, I’ve learned that when nudges from out of nowhere are persistent, peaceful, and consistent with Biblical principles, it’s most likely the Good Shepherd prodding me to change things up.
I imagine I’ll keep writing (without any deadlines) for as long as I have two brain cells to rub together. When I do, I’ll post it on my website (maryanncrum.com), where you can also find all my past columns, and on my Facebook page. You can also listen to “Unquenchable Hope” on those two sites and rest assured, the podcast nearly always includes the kind of weird stories you’re used to reading here.
“Live and Learn” has been a big, wonderful part of my journey. You faithful readers have been with me through births, deaths, weddings, surgeries, snakes, chickens, and a thousand other things. Through it all, I hope you saw a glimpse of our great God.
Keep looking in even the most ordinary places and you’ll find Him because, as I hope I’ve communicated all these years, He really does want to be found.
May God bless you with more and more of Himself.